The One With the Cheesy Gifts
by PhoenixRisingOnTheMoon
Summary: When an anonymous person keeps sending Regina gifts, Emma realizes her negative feelings may be because she's jealous that someone is trying to garner Regina's attention. Written for Swan Queen Week Day 2: Jealousy.


When Emma walked in to the mayor's office, she did not expect to see two large bouquets of various flowers sitting in vases on the desk.

"Where'd you get the flowers?" she asked.

Regina looked up from her paperwork. "Hello, Emma, it's good to see you too. I'm doing fine, how are you?" she asked sarcastically.

Emma rolled her eyes and placed the bag with Regina's lunch in it in front of the brunette. "Yeah, yeah, yeah. But really," she said as she took a seat and propped her feet up, "what's with the flowers?"

A small smile graced Regina's face as she looked at the bouquets. "It appears I have a secret admirer."

"A… secret admirer?" Emma asked, placing her feet back down and straightening up. "Do you know who it is?"

Regina tilted her head and raised an eyebrow. "Did I not just say it was a _secret_ admirer?" She shuffled the papers she was working on into a folder. "I have no idea who would send me these. There was a very lovely note attached, though." She picked up a card propped between the vases and handed it to Emma.

Emma took the note begrudgingly and opened it up.

 _Roses are red_

 _Violets are blue_

 _But none of these flowers_

 _Are as pretty as you_

 _-Your Secret Admirer_

Emma laughed. "You call that lovely?"

Regina snatched the note from her hands. "Yes, I do! It may be simple and not the most original poem—"

"It's the most used poem since… forever!" Emma exclaimed.

"Well I find it to be a very sweet gesture," Regina said, a snarl creeping into her voice. "It's not often that people send me gifts that aren't flaming dog feces or rolls of toilet paper strewn about."

"C'mon, Regina," Emma sighed. "This is one of the most unoriginal, unthoughtful things a person can do to woo someone. Flowers are one of the oldest tricks in the book. If you're going to try and impress someone, you have to do something more personal to them."

Regina crossed her arms in front of her chest and leaned back in her chair. "I think you're just jealous because someone likes me and is sending me nice things."

Emma's eyes widened and she felt her heart rate pick up. "What? Why would I be jealous?"

"Because I'm getting nice things and you're not," Regina replied simply and smugly. "You, my dear, are jealous."

Emma ignored the feeling of relief that spread through her. "Yeah, totally," she answered. She felt her phone vibrate in her pocket and pulled it out. "Hello?… Yeah, I'll be there in a minute." She pocketed her phone and picked up her uneaten bag of lunch. "Sorry to cut our lunch short, but duty calls."

"I'm sure it does," Regina replied.

Emma ignored her comment. "See you tomorrow, then? Same time, same place?"

Regina nodded. "Indeed, I will see you tomorrow, dear."

* * *

A week later, Emma walked into the Rabbit Hole late in the evening and slumped down onto a bar stool. "Hey Rubes, get me a shot of tequila, please."

When her drink was delivered, Emma quickly slugged it back and slammed it down onto the bar, asking for a refill, which she slugged back just as quickly.

"Guy problems?" Ruby asked as she eyed her friend worriedly.

Emma shook her head.

Ruby tilted her head and smiled knowingly. "Lady problems, then?"

Emma shot her a glare, but didn't deny it.

A few seconds later, Emma sighed. "It's… it's Regina."

Ruby smiled gleefully. "Oooh, do tell." She poured Emma a glass of water.

"So Monday I went in for our daily lunch together, and she had two vases of these really nice looking flowers with a cheesy note attached," Emma explained. "And Tuesday, there was this stupid giant teddy bear, and Wednesday, there was a giant box of chocolates. On Thursday, I saw she was wearing new earrings, and today she had a box with a dress in it and a note telling her to wear it with the earrings tonight for a dinner meet-up." Emma took a sip of her water. "And the worst part is that Regina's falling for all that cheesy shit."

"Is someone a little jealous?" Ruby asked with a wolfish grin.

Emma sputtered up some water. "No! I'm not!" She sighed. "I just think that if someone's going to take the time to woo a fancy lady like Regina, they should put more thought into it. Like they picked all of the least original things."

"How would you 'woo' her?" Ruby asked.

Emma looked up at that. "How would I woo her? I wouldn't, for starters, because I know I'd get a big whopping 'no' for an answer. She'd never want to go out with me, no matter what I did or said, or how I feel."

Ruby squinted her eyes a little. "Let's say she did. How would you let her know you were attracted to her?"

"I…" Emma shrugged. "I'd probably take her out on a horse ride, even though I'm still terrified of them, because it's something I know she would enjoy. I might plan a family day in the park. I… I don't know." She shrugged again. "No matter what I planned, though, I would do something that I know she would enjoy because I want her to be happy, not because I googled it and found the 'Top 5' list for how to properly pursue someone." She looked down at her water. "I just want her to be happy," she repeated softly.

A voice from behind Emma spoke. "Is that true, Emma?"

Emma turned around and felt her heart plummet to her stomach. "Regina… I… I didn't know you were there. I thought… I thought you had a date…"

Regina pulled out a piece of paper from her pocket that Emma recognized as the note from the admirer about the planned meeting for that night.

"I do," she said as she handed the paper to Emma.

Emma flipped open the note and read the bottom part.

 _I would be delighted if you would meet me tonight at the Rabbit Hole at 6:00. I'll be the one at the bar with a glass of water. I hope to see you there._

 _-Your Secret Admirer_

Emma looked up and down the bar and saw that she was the only one there. "Looks like they're a no show," she stated as she handed back the note, refusing to meet Regina's eyes.

Regina raised an eyebrow. "Really, Miss Swan?" She looked pointedly at the glass of water in front of Emma.

Emma looked at the glass and sighed, closing her eyes. When she opened them again, she sent a glare to the bartender in front of her. "Ruby…"

Ruby put on an innocent face. "What? I, being the good friend I am, gave you a water to try and help decrease the chances of a hangover tomorrow."

"Ruby…"

The tall brunette sighed. "Okay, fine. I did it. I did it all." She pointed at the two women on the other side of the bar. "And I only did it to make _you two_ happy!"

"Miss Lucas, could you please explain exactly what it is you did?" Regina asked, crossing her arms in front of herself.

"I sent you anonymous gifts to make Emma jealous," Ruby explained bluntly. "And I knew that she would come here as soon as her shift ended on Friday to drink away her feelings rather than face them." She looked at the blonde. "You really are predictable, you know."

"So… there was no secret admirer," Regina interrupted, her face falling. She scoffed. "Why did I even bother getting my hopes up? Nobody could fall for the Evil Queen." She sat down on the bar stool next to Emma, looking dejected.

Ruby let out a groan of frustration. "Seriously? Did you not just hear what Emma said? You two make me so angry! For months— no, wait, _years_ now, I've been waiting for one of you to just make a goddamn move so you two can live happily ever after! I'm sick of your stupid lovey-dovey eyes that you send each other all the time, and your dumb loving smiles, and the ridiculous need to pretend that you're happy and content with Graham, or Hook, or Robin, or any other guy when it's clear that happiness is staring you in the face in each other!" She threw her hands in the air. "Nope. I'm done. You two are hopeless."

Regina and Emma watched, jaws dropped, as Ruby flaunted away to the other end of the bar and took a newcomer's order.

They slowly turned and looked at each other.

"So…" Emma started.

"So," Regina repeated.

Small smiles blessed their faces as they stared into each other's eyes before both of them realized that they were doing exactly what Ruby had just mentioned.

Emma let out a small laugh. "I guess we have been kind of ridiculous," she said, looking nervously at Regina to see if she agreed.

Regina nodded slowly. "It seems we have."

"So…" Emma began again. "Do you want to… go on a picnic this weekend? Maybe… take some horses from the stable and ride the trail up to Bambi's Creek in the forest?"

Regina smiled. "I would love to."


End file.
